


wonder of your touch

by SailorChibi



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alpha Castiel, Alpha Sam, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alpha/Omega, Clinginess, Comfort, Crying, Cuddling, Dean Winchester Feels, Embarrassment, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Family, Gentle Dom Castiel, Hurt/Comfort, John Winchester's A+ Parenting, Knotting, M/M, Mates, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Mating mark, Nesting, Omega Dean, Omega Verse, Omega posing as a Beta, Platonic Cuddling, Praise Kink, Spanking, Voyeurism, Winchester Brothers - Freeform, dean winchester has trouble with emotions, dean winchester needs a hug, no hurt, pack as family, touch starved, voyeurism as normal and natural
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-07
Updated: 2015-06-07
Packaged: 2018-04-03 07:38:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,695
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4092607
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SailorChibi/pseuds/SailorChibi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's natural for omegas to have family members present during the first couple of days of their heat while their alpha takes care of them. Having family present offers stability and grounding, keeping the omega from physically and mentally dropping from being touch starved until their heat really sets in. </p><p>After Purgatory, when Dean can't pretend he's a beta anymore, that proves to be the part that he has the most difficulty with.</p>
            </blockquote>





	wonder of your touch

**Author's Note:**

  * For [majestic_duck (majesticduxk)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/majesticduxk/gifts).



> This is for my friend's birthday. <3 She is a huge fan of wincest which isn't really my thing, so I went for destiel with super!supportive!Sam and some needy Dean. Happy Birthday!

There are definitely days when Dean misses that little white pill. Just one a day, discretely swallowed as soon as he got out of bed in the morning – before a bleary-eyed Sam or a drunk John realized what he was doing – was enough to keep his heats at bay. For years, that little white pill was enough to fool even his brother into thinking that Dean was a beta. He didn’t have a heat for the first time until he came back from Purgatory, when the sudden return to Earth made his body go haywire.

Sam freaked out. Like, lost his shit, thought Dean was _dying_ level of freaking out. That time is still on the record as one of their biggest fights, so Dean prefers not to think about it. But he still misses the pills. The emotional bullshit was a lot easier to deal with when the pills locked down on the physical side of it. Sometimes he thinks about reaching out to old contacts, procuring some more, but Sam tends to watch him like a hawk every three months. And of course, now that he and Cas are mated, it’s out of the question.

Still doesn’t stop him from missing them. Dean rolls his shoulders in an effort to loosen up the muscles a little, staring at the steaming cup of coffee in front of him. Normally he’s halfway through a huge breakfast by now, but he’s not hungry. It’s hot in the room, or maybe that’s just him, and he can feel sweat collecting along the back of his neck and shoulders. When he shifts in his seat a little, he realizes that his boxers are sticking to him for an entirely different reason.

He tells himself that there’s still time to leave the bunker. Quietly slip out, come back in a week, and no one has to know the difference. Except they all know he’d never make it through the week without coming back with his tail between his legs, so weak in the knees for a little bit of contact from his mate and his brother that he’d go belly up for them at the slightest command. Dean knows. It’s happened before. The punishment after the fact – a thorough spanking from Cas combined with the silent treatment from Sam – wasn’t worth it, not to mention he’d spent those three days alone in an agony akin to withdrawal.

“Dean.”

Dean startles badly, knocking his cup of coffee over. Somehow Cas is standing beside him, even though Dean didn’t even notice him coming into the room. Cas looks him over, not even trying to be subtle about it, eyes narrowed a little as he takes in the sweat on Dean’s face. His nose twitches a couple of times as he takes deep breaths, trying to figure out how far along in his heat Dean is. Finally, he holds a hand out in an unspoken invitation.

Because sometimes, even though he knows better than to leave the bunker, Dean still fights this. He’ll go off on his own and hide for a while, until the craving for a knot coupled with the fear that maybe he’s alone in this after all get to him, and he gives in to the urge to go find what he needs so badly. 

He’s tired today. Too tired to fight the inevitable. He puts his hand into Cas’s and his alpha’s eyes go all soft, grip tightening a little to pull Dean to his feet. Dean stumbles, the room swaying a little, and lets himself lean into Cas. Cas puts an arm around his waist and starts to help him out of the kitchen, but Dean resists.

“My coffee,” he says; he likes his kitchen too much to leave such a mess, and scrubbing dried coffee off the table and the floor will be a bitch.

“It’s okay. Sam will take care of it.”

Dean looks up at that, instinctively searching the room for his brother, but Sam’s too smart for that: he’s probably hiding just outside the kitchen, might’ve even been the one to alert Cas to Dean’s state, waiting until Cas takes Dean away before he comes in. He’ll join them later, once the physical craving has been taken care of and Dean’s in that needy omega stage where no amount of touch is enough.

“Okay,” he says, trusting Cas, and follows Cas on legs that feel too weak to support his weight properly. Cas half-carries him, still unnaturally strong even though he’s not technically an angel anymore, supporting him all the way back to their bedroom. The sight of the bed, covers tossed back haphazardly and smelling so strongly of Cas, ignites the first spark of desire under Dean’s skin. It feels like the heat of his body is coiling inward now, sweat drying on his neck, burning him from the inside out. He whimpers.

Cas shushes him, hands gentle as he strips them both until they’re naked, then pushes Dean to lie on his back. The sheets are cool beneath his skin, and Dean tries to relax, though that’s easier said than done when Cas doesn’t immediately join him. Instead, his alpha goes to their closet and takes out the stack of blankets that Dean likes to use during his heat. They’re all soft, won’t feel rough or scratchy against his too sensitive skin, and smell like the bunker. Like home.

Most of the blankets end up around the bed, building a little nest in the center; Cas sets the rest at the end, for when Dean inevitably grows cold, and then returns to the closet a second time. Dean’s face grows hot for a different reason when he sees the two sweatshirts Cas comes back with. One is Cas’s, the other is Sam’s, and Cas sets them both up near Dean’s face so that he can breathe the scents in. Dean squeezes his eyes shut, embarrassed, but can’t stop himself from inhaling.

“That’s it,” Cas rumbles at him, stroking Dean’s flank, fingers light and cool. He slips into the bed behind Dean, hugging him from behind, dropping kisses onto Dean’s bared neck. “My sweet little omega. You’re so good for me, Dean.”

Dean whines a little, because he’s really not. Most omegas are demure and soft-spoken, and even the ones that aren’t, like Charlie, know better than to fight against instinct. Heat wouldn’t be so bad if a couple of quick, hard fucks could take of it. It’s the emotional aspect that gets to him: the neediness and clinginess, the desire for touch that isn’t sexual, the fear that Cas and Sam will both disappear if they leave the room, the way he can’t control any of it. It’s humiliating.

Sam told him once, during that first awkward heat with Cas when Dean was simultaneously swearing at his brother while trying to get as close as possible, that Dean only has himself to blame. That if he hadn’t abused suppressants for years out of some stupid, irrational desire to pretend he’s something he’s not, he wouldn’t be nearly this bad off, so he could just stop being such a drama queen and just accept help already. 

Cas’s face had gone kind of still and very cold, and the look he’d given Sam had shut Sam up immediately. Dean was so embarrassed he’d refused touch except for the bare minimum during the rest of his heat, and in the days that followed – when he had a fever and could barely focus, when an hour without touch left him shivering and barely coherent – Sam had practically groveled for forgiveness. Of course, the tongue lashing that Dean is positive Cas gave him probably helped.

“Come back to me, Dean,” Cas murmurs in his ear, petting Dean’s ribs now. “Stop thinking so much, beloved. Just give into it.” He sweeps his fingers down, lazily encircling Dean’s cock, giving the swollen flesh a few long strokes. Dean twitches, keening, dropping his head back to better fill his senses with _Cas_. His hips jerk a few times before Cas stops him, pressing him back until he can feel Cas’s cock against his ass, and that’s what sends him over the edge.

It happens way too fast, but the first time during his heat is always like that, and it just makes the ache in his belly even more poignant. Dean grinds back, purposely rubbing his leaking ass against Cas, until the alpha growls deep in his throat and guides his cock to Dean’s hole. Dean’s used to being knotted for the first time when he’s deeper into heat, and he’s almost forgotten how good it feels when it burns a little. Cas is huge even without the knot, and his dick spreads Dean wide open.

“Cas, Cas,” Dean pants, grabbing onto the sweatshirts, pressing his face into them. Cas rocks against him, setting up a careful rhythm, but there’ll be time for that in the last stages of heat. Dean wants more. He clenches down purposely, feeling the swell of Cas’s knot against his rim, dragging and catching in a way that makes Dean’s breath hitch. 

“Gonna knot you, sweet boy,” Cas says, sounding remarkably restrained considering the circumstances. “Then you’ll have a chance to rest and we’ll let Sam come in, okay?”

“Need you,” Dean manages to say. Because it’s true. He _needs_ Cas, doesn’t know how he would’ve gotten through this without him. Cas keeps him grounded and stops him from doing stupid, self-destructive shit for the sake of pride. Cas loves him.

“I’m here, Dean. You ready for me?”

Dean grits his teeth and nods, hard again already, because the first orgasm was barely even a taste compared to what he really needs. His eyes flutter shut and he cries out as Cas’s hips slam forward, the knot slipping into him and then swelling as Cas starts to come, and the feel of that and the knot pressing against his prostate makes Dean’s toes curl. Blinding pleasure sweeps over him, starting out painfully hot at first but quickly turning deliciously cool, and he melts into the bed with a moan.

Breathless praise spills from Cas’s lips as he keeps rocking against Dean, and it’s a good five minutes before he finally slumps against Dean. He spends a little while kissing the back of Dean’s neck again, nibbling at the mating mark. Every nip of Cas’s teeth against that spot makes little shiver runs through Dean, though it’s not enough to get him hard again. He’ll have an hour, maybe two, before the next wave of his heat sets in.

“Think I’m good right now,” Dean says, his voice hoarse already, which tells him he must’ve been crying out Cas’s name without even realizing it.

“Dean,” Cas says meaningfully, putting an awful lot behind that one word.

“I mean it, Cas, I’m fine. Don’t need Sam in here. Maybe later.”

Cas’s hand grips his chin, pulling his head around so that Dean has no choice but to look at him. Dean squirms under the intensity in that gaze, knowing that Cas can see straight through him. There’s a little part of Dean’s mind that is already wondering whether Sam’s still out there in the bunker, or whether his brother decided to pack up and find an omega of his own to take care of instead. Another shiver runs through Dean, this one having nothing to do with desire, and Cas’s expression hardens.

“I’m disappointed in you,” he says. “You know better than to lie to me. I’m calling Sam in.”

“No, don’t!” Dean squeaks, face reddening. He hates letting Sam see him like this, strung out for Cas’s knot like a needy bitch. He doesn’t give a shit that it’s _normal_ , that most omegas have their entire packs in the room during the first day of the heat, because the thought of Sam watching him and Cas mating makes him want to shrivel up and die.

The hand that spanks him hard on his right buttock isn’t unexpected, but it still hurts. Dean yelps, clinging to the sweatshirts, hiding his face as Cas spanks him hard and fast to the point of tears. It’s only when he’s in tears - not from the pain, but from frustrated helplessness - that he feels a blanket being pulled up to their waists, and then the bed sinks as someone – Sam – sits down. Sam’s huge hand touches the top of his head, gently stroking through Dean’s hair, and Dean shudders as the last knot of tension in his chest unwinds and he starts crying even harder.

“Hey, it’s okay,” Sam says, shifting a little closer, until Dean can grab onto his jeans instead of the sweatshirt. He doesn’t say anything else, and Dean’s grateful for that. Sam’s initial comments about being a drama queen still sting, because that’s not how it was at all. Dean hid his omega status for a reason: he had to protect Sam, and John wouldn’t have looked at him the same if he knew. But meaningless platitudes about how Dean shouldn’t be embarrassed and how natural this is are almost worst.

Cas smoothes a hand across Dean’s aching ass and presses his mouth to the mating mark. His actions speak far louder than words ever could, but as embarrassing as it is to be spanked like an omega – especially when Sam probably knows exactly what just happened – it’s also kind of comforting. Cas wouldn’t spank him if he didn’t care, and Dean knows he’s scared the shit out of Cas and Sam more than a few times. It’s a preventative measure, like taking vitamins before you get sick, but not nearly as easy to swallow.

“Sammy,” he says, the word dragged out of him, barely audible, but of course Sam’s alpha ears pick up on it.

“Yeah, Dean?” Sam says, like an eager to please puppy, and maybe that’s the one redeeming feature of this bullshit: alphas are hardwired to want to take care of omegas, but it’s especially prominent during heats. Dean’s pretty sure he could ask for anything right now, and, as long as it didn’t cause him harm, Cas and Sam would do anything to provide it. It’s completely possible that at some point Dean will take full advantage of that.

“Could you –” Dean cuts off, but tugs weakly at Sam’s jeans. He needs his brother closer. Cas is one long line of heat along his back, but his front feels cold. 

To his credit, Sam works hard to control the huge smile trying to break out across his face. He scoots down the bed until there’s only a little space between him and Dean, though he doesn’t try to do anything girly like putting his arm around Dean. He does put his hand safely on Dean’s hip, letting Dean press his face into Sam’s shoulder. His brother smells comfortingly of home, and the slow itch of discomfort under his skin that he hadn’t really registered until now finally subsides. He feels normal again, but also somehow _more_.

It won’t last long. In an hour or so he’ll be revved up again, needing Cas to knot him again, and he’ll get all flustered in the contrary desires to both kick Sam out and keep him around. So far the former always wins, because Dean is not going to let his little brother watch him be knotted no matter how many ‘embracing your omega side’ pamphlets Sam leaves around the bunker, but that doesn’t make it any easier. Neither do Cas and Sam, who always tell him it’s his choice as long as Sam comes in after, and he might end up getting spanked again if he puts up a fight about that. 

That’s for later, though, and in the meantime, he can let himself enjoy this. Something that, as a terrified fourteen-year-old omega downing suppressants in the bathroom for the first time while his baby brother cried for their MIA dad, he’d never thought that he would get to have. Cas’s hand, hot like a brand against his shoulder where Dean once bore an angel’s handprint, reminds him that it’s all real.

**Author's Note:**

> Come visit me on [tumblr](http://tsuki-chibi.tumblr.com/).


End file.
